My student started his speech like this: “You know that annoying person at work? The one who drives you crazy, who insists on doing that annoying thing that you can’t stand? Picture that annoying person. Imagine who they are in your workplace…
Now consider this: What if that annoying person is you?”
Oh, dude. I clapped my hands in delight.
That annoying person? It’s always you.
It’s always you!
OMG. I’m so psyched. I’m about to set you free.
That annoying person is you.
It’s ok, boo.
Let me show you the path out of this little jungle. The annoyances, the aggravations, the frustration will soon be soothed away.
That annoying person is also your greatest teacher. Bow to them. Smile to them. Thank them for showing up in your life. They are doing you a huge favor. They are holding up a mirror and forcing you to look.
That thing that annoys you about THEM? It totally annoys you about YOU.
You don’t like how that person causes drama? Look in the mirror: Do you create drama? Do you create drama at home? Drama on Facebook? Drama with yourself?
It’s ok. There’s a reason for it. Be compassionate about it. Try to understand it. Look for the good in that person and in you.
They’re not all drama. Neither are you.
You don’t like how that person is mean to their assistant? Look in the mirror: Are you mean to others in your life? Are you mean to yourself? Do you belittle yourself for making mistakes?
It’s ok. Get curious. Be compassionate about it. Understand it. Look for the good in that person. You don’t know everything about them.
They’re not always mean. Neither are you.
You can think that people are “toxic,” or they may be scared to death.
You can think that people are “difficult,” or they could be incredibly anxious.
You can think that people are “mean,” or they could be hiding a lot of pain.
The story you choose about them is up to you.
But first, look in the mirror.
Are you the toxic one?
Are you difficult?
Are you mean?
Are you annoying?
Yes, you are. Every single one of you. Me too. And that’s ok.
We’re also scared and deserve compassion.
We’re also anxious and deserve to be soothed.
We’re also in pain and deserve comfort.
Beautiful reader: That annoying person is you. Today, set yourself free. Decide right now to stop being annoyed. Decide today to look in the mirror and learn from your greatest teachers. Notice how we are all human. Choose compassion over judgement. Choose understanding over criticism. See the good in everyone, including yourself.
You know my favorite thing about the mirror theory? It goes both ways.
There’s a beautiful person in your life. You love and admire them. They have amazing qualities that inspire you. Guess what?
They’re just holding up a mirror.
Those amazing qualities of theirs are the ones you love most about yourself.
That beautiful and inspiring person is you. It’s always been you.